Hey! Hi! Hello!
I have been MIA for a solid 2 months I guess now. The week I became a Keller Williams agent (so so excited!) I found out my best friend has a tumor in her mouth more that likely cancerous...
My Lu Lu is old, but she is not that old. I never thought this would be what takes her out. My mind.. my thoughts just went all into a blurr.
I give her medication to make her comfortable, but my heart breaks. She wags her tail, jumps at the door to go out, and eats like a pig. But this tumor is so aggressive.
I took my Lu Lu to the vet last week, so my vet could see how fast the tumor has grown. It's big. How fast/aggressive this tumor has grown, she believes it is cancerous. I cried so much. Well if I'm being honest I have cried everyday for 4 weeks.
We talked about time. Time, I struggle so much with this. Why? I have to decide. The balance of not cutting her life short, but then not wanting her to suffer or her puncturing the tumor with uncontrollable bleeding, that would result in a ER visit.
Daily... I clean her from the blood/drool coming from her mouth, help her eat, make her comfortable, give her medication. But also daily she gives me her tennis ball, begs for a snack, and loves evening walks.
Next week I take Lu Lu back to the vet to talk about time again. (I have been stuck here for a long time typing) A week ago I was told probably 4 more weeks and 7 weeks she probably wouldn't be here at all. I love my vet. She has seen Lucy for 5 years, her brother Thor since he was a puppy, and her 2 other brothers Kevin and Stuart. She has seen me smile and be so happy and now cry... so many tears. But she has been there every step of the way.
Now, I'm trying to find the balance. b a l a n c e Still struggle daily, but trying. Trying to enjoy our walks more, car rides, and snuggles. Not wanting to leave her, but trying to do what I can from home with real estate. I was sooooo excited for a career that allowed me to chase my d r e a m. & for the last 2 months I have been so lost in a blurr.
I will not give up. I will not give up. I will not give up.
Since I was a little girl watching my cousins Barrel Race, it has been my DREAM.
I am here in the moment with Lu Lu. BUT I WILL NOT GIVE UP.
Love you all,
LV <3
Live with Purpose
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